Sexual Purity: My story, My say, My stand

It’s World Sexual Purity Day, a movement that started 5 years ago by Pastor Victor Olukoju (PVO), the founder of Sexual Purity Academy.

Coincidentally, there was a webinar organized by Golden Teens Corner tagged Sexual PuriTEEN last weekend and I was opportune to talk to the Teenagers on Sexual Purity.

Yesterday, I felt the nudge to share my notes from the discussion (though with some little additions & corrections) with a wider range of audience. Hence, the reason for this post on this blog.

I plead you read through till the end and may you be blessed as you do so.

I will start by saying that as much as God created us as spiritual beings, He also created us as sexual beings.

I want to believe we all know this. But you know what?

In order for the devil to attack our spiritual being, he works tirelessly to use the sexuality God created for His glory to offend Him.

MY SAY

One of the most commonest & powerful weapon Satan is using in this last days is the WEAPON OF SEXUAL SINS. And we can’t shy away from the fact that Christians also struggle with sexual sins.

This is the reason why we can’t take this issue of sexual purity with levity.

Let me add this: Gone are those days when fornication is the only sexual sin we clamour on. Nowadays, there are degrees & varieties of what we call sexual sins and many are entangled therein.

And of cause, no one is so small again in this world not to understand that there is an evil called SEXUAL SIN.

This is because this sin is propagated & promoted widely and seen every now & then.

I will love to share a quick summary of my personal experience but first, let us understand what sexual sins are and the need for sexual purity plus what God has to say about sexual purity.

Sexual immorality (sins) means defying God’s law of sexual relations.

Our anchor verses is from 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (AMP)

18) Run away from sexual immorality [in any form, whether thought or behavior, whether visual or written]. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the one who is sexually immoral sins against his own body.

From this verse, we see that the Bible tells us expressly to RUN from sexual immorality.

This depicts that engaging in sexual sins is evil & dangerous. You know there are times God will say RESIST the devil, right?

But in the case of sexual sins, you don’t RESIST but you RUN πŸƒβ€β™€οΈ.

And this version says Run away from sexual immorality [in any form, whether thought or behavior, whether visual or written].

That means there are different forms to sexual sins. There are some that might not be committing sexual sins outrightly but within them they are committing those sins.

In short, the person that fornicates & the person that thinks about it are the same.

The person that watches pornography& the one that read sexual stories are the same.

The one that do not act it but write about it are the same.

So, whether in thought, action, visual or written, sexual sin is sexual sin.

And God frowns at any act of such.

You now know the most saddened part of it is that the Bible says Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the one who is sexually immoral sins against his own body .

19) Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is within you, whom you have [received as a gift] from God, and that you are not your own [property]?

This verse lay emphasis on the fact that we do not own ourselves, so we shouldn’t do anything with it bodies anyhow. It’s very essential to note that Holy Spirit can’t dwell in a sexually polluted body.

20) You were bought with a price [you were actually purchased with the precious blood of Jesus and made His own]. So then, honor and glorify God with your body.

Verse 20 says we are bought with a price . A precious priceless price – THE BLOOD OF JESUS. Therefore, we ought to honour God with our body. Engaging in any FORM of sexual sin means we are dishonouring God in our body.

Now, I’ll love to say that anyone struggling with sexual sins today is not alone.

Yes, the person is not alone because he/she has God who sets free.

That person is not alone because he/she won’t be the first in that shoe. There are people ahead of you who had once been entangled but got free through the power of God.

Even King David a man after God’s own heart wrestled with sexual sin. When he saw a beautiful woman named Bathsheba, he was overcome by his own lust. He then went to great lengths to hide his sin. But thanks to a faithful & forgiving God, David found his way home (2 Samuel 11:12).

DAVID IS LONG GONE BUT WE HAVE STORIES OF PEOPLE IN OUR CONTEMPORARY TIME THAT PROVE THAT WE CAN ALSO BE SEXUALLY PURE. Even if we had done wrong before, God is ready to restore us.

Β MY STORY

Growing up, I used to be a very gentle and calm girl but battled with a lot with depression and loneliness. Also, I feltΒ  I wasn’t loved enough.

In bid to get over my loneliness, I resulted to reading of novels to keep up with my loneliness.

Then, I could finish a novel of 300+ pages in a day. Like, I was really vast & fast in reading novels.

From there, I started getting exposed to many evil things at a young age.

And I got so addicted.

From there, masturbation crept in. This was the biggest struggle ever.

It became serious that I could commit this act anywhere.

I once masturbated even in the church. Just imagine πŸ˜’!!!

Fast forward to the third term of my SSS1, I entered into a relationship like that which lasted for a year, a month and some days.

That was the beginning of my so boyfriend/girlfriend relationship escapades. Even though I never engaged in sex in any of those relationships but the relationships were not sexually pure ones at all πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ.

As time went by, I got entangled in pornography as well.

I so watched so pornography. I need to let you know that I was a chorister in the church right from Youth church, even serving as an executive and was still bound in sexual sins.

I was living such a sanctimonious life. People see me and assume all was well whereas I was battling with so many things. This went on for about 10Β  years or so.

Now, from personal experiences, I can categorically say engaging in SEXUAL SIN is being in BONDAGE. Sexual sins might be sweet when committing the act but the aftermath is disastrous:

1) Sexual sins pose one to different demonic attacks.

After committing those acts then, I will have BAD & SCARY dreams.

In fact, I will sleep and will not be aware of my environment again.

Those engage in sexual sins are also prone to have spirit husbands, wives & children.

 

2) Sexual sins drains one of strength (spiritual, physical & mental strength.

3) Sexual sins draw one away from God. This is the most disastrous of all. When one is faraway from God, one is prone to evil things.

4) Sexual sins do leave one with guilt, condemnation, self pity, hatred, etc

 

5) Sexual sins might result in serious health challenges.

6) Sexual sins will hinder one from fulfilling purpose as one ought to.

7) Sexual sin if eventually not dealt with will land one in HELL FIRE.

There are so many other consequences of sexual sins but I’ll limit them to these 7.

Now, how do one who is ENTANGLED OR INVOLVED in any sexual sin get FREE?

The FREEDOM is CHRIST & in HIM alone.

No matter how far one has gone, there is much grace available to save.

Although in all sincerity, the battle for sexual purity or the struggle to be free is not an easy one.

Personally, there were times I cried so much in my closet. I made so much promises to God to change. I remember there was a particular day I jumped from the up bunk in school all because I was tired with my life.

Everyday was a day to repent for me. When I see people talk about their salvation story and the day they were saved, I always felt sad because I couldn’t really point to a specific day.

I could not tell anyone my struggles for fear of AND YOU ARE A PASTOR’S CHILD OH. Coupled with the fact that many have high expectations of one. Besides, I was doing well in other aspects of my life.

You know that kind of thing nah.

 

The good news is that there are so many ways to getting FREE but I have summarized them into 10 points here:

1) Never lose hope: If there is anyone in the act of one sexual sin or the other, please don’t lose hope of being delivered.

That’s the beginning of your journey to your deliverance.

The devil can so much make one feel that God will never ever forgive.

I had that thoughts too and it almost never made me got free.

I would think “After all the preachings I have had and promises I have made, can God still save me?”

But I will love to tell you to have confidence that God can save you and will save you.

But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him – Jeremiah 17:7 (KJV)

 

2) Genuinely repent: There is no two way to this. All you need to do is repent.

Be sincerely sorry for your sins and ask for mercy.

See, if one still has pleasure in doing whatsoever sexual sin it is, that person will never be free.

You need to hate the sin, repent and be determined to forsake them all.

Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out – Acts 3:19 (ESV)

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. – 1 John 1:8 (ESV)

3) Have faith in God: Our salvation is by grace through faith in God. One needs to strongly trust that God had indeed forgiven the sins committed.

One need to also trust Him that He is able to help you stand.

Faith! It is an important element in a believer’s life.

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. – Hebrews 11:1 (KJV)

 

4) Speak out: In all sincerity, it might be difficult to speak out especially if you happen to be my kind of person who loves privacy or someone who is introverted.

However, you need to know that sin thrives in secrecy.

Well, I need to say that many get scared of speaking out because of fear of being talked down or being looked upon with disdain. That is why I will say that prayerfully seek whom you could speak to and be ready to open your heart as well.

5) Be deliberate about your freedom: Sexual sin will never agree to leave one, it is one that will get determine to leave.

You have to consciously avoid any object of temptation.

🎯 Watch what you read (both offline and online).

🎯 Watch what you discuss with people, even so called Christians. There are times when mere talk around sex by people is what triggers them to commit sin.

In situations like that, excuse yourself from the discussion. If it’s a gathering you can’t leave, cover your ears or plug your earpiece and start listening to edifying songs.

🎯 Watch what you watch. That is one of the reasons I don’t like watching American movies. They project so much sexual scenes in their movies.

🎯 Watch what you think or meditate on.

🎯 Watch your actions: Anyone seeking freedom from sexual sin will avoid being in close door with the opposite sex. The person should avoid being clingy to the opposite sex. The person should watch how he/she relates around them. I know of some people who don’t shake hands nor hug. Shaking and hugging is not a sin but it’s just their own way of shielding themselves.

🎯 Don’t stay alone if you know staying alone might make you fall.

🎯 Get busy. Take up responsibilities. Sexual sins will always make one feel unworthy or unqualified to do anything. But then, get something doing. Write if you can. Compose songs.

6) Have an accountability partner: If one seeks for quick freedom, then such a one should have someone who can always watch his/her back.

I had the issue of having accountability partner because I trusted no one then and it really worsened the situation. Now, I understand what role an accountability partner can play in the life of a believer that seeks for growth.

Also, if you are someone’s accountability partner, endeavour to watch the person closely and check up regularly. However, the other person should also learn to speak up even without being asked.

If someone is accountable to you, be faithful. You shouldn’t be telling every bro Johnson and sis Juliet of what sis Benedict is struggling with. You get that?

7) Pray: Prayer is very key in a believer’s life. It is in the place of prayer one can receive grace, strength and power to overcome.

A prayerless Christian is a powerless Christian.

If you think you don’t know how to pray, start by PRAYING THE SCRIPTURES.

I love the book of ROMANS so much because it talks about sin, death and freedom.

Some of the verses I love praying with is πŸ‘‡

Romans 6:14 – For sin shall not have dominion over me. For I am not under the law but under grace.

Another one is πŸ‘‡

Romans 8:1 – There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh but after the Spirit.

Praying is like sowing a seed. There were times I cried and even fasted and I still fell again. But in all, I never stopped praying. Besides, I knew it was a situation beyond my power.

One can also listen to messages and songs that will spur one to pray as well.

There are so many verses that talks about prayers, let’s check them out.

8) Forgive yourself: If you still blame yourself for past actions and sins even after God has forgiven you, you will never be free.

This is because one will keep wallowing in guilt and condemnation and if care is not taken, such a one might fall again.

Some might have gone deep into sexual sins by having all kinds of sex or abortion. But I must tell you that no matter how great the sins might be, God will forgive if one repents.

And if God can forgive, why then will one not forgiving himself/herself?

9) Feed on God’s Word and practice meditation:

The Bible is sweet to read.

Read several versions of the Bible to get deep understanding and love of whatever verse you read.

Don’t just read but study the Scriptures.
Affirm the promises in it.
Draw strength from it.
Meditate on it.

One can decorate the wall of his/her room with Bible references that you’ll always see and meditate on.

10) Celebrate your victory daily: Devil is not always happy when people are happy πŸ˜…. All he loves is seeing place people in agony, self pity, sadness, etc.

Celebration pisses him off so much.

So, let him know you’re happy and joyful in the Lord no matter what happens.

Rejoice always – 1 Thessalonians 5:16.

MY STAND

Finally, I’ll leave you with this verse of the Scriptures in different versions (1 Thessalonians 4:3) πŸ‘‡:

God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin – NLT

For this is the will of God, that you be sanctified [separated and set apart from sin]: that you abstain and back away from sexual immorality – AMP

God’s will is for you to be set apart for him in holiness and that you keep yourselves unpolluted from sexual keep – TPT.

Dear One, are you struggling with sexual sin or any kind of sin? Remember that GRACE is available for you now that you still liveth. No matter how deep you might have gone, God is still calling & willing to help you overcome.

He has helped many, yours will not be exception.

Sexual is achievable & attainable.

Happy World Sexual Purity Day.
Continue to glorify God in your body and spirit.

Feel free to share the link to this article with your others. Do you have any personal question to ask or you want to discuss something as relating to this topic, kindly reach out to me via email.

Author: Elizabeth Tolulope Egbeniyi

Hiya!!! I am Elizabeth Tolulope Egbeniyi, a health and lifestyle blogger, plant scientist, teen coach, volunteer, baker, budding entrepreneur and most importantly, a child of God. I'm an ardent advocate of using herbs for healing and health. Welcome to my space.

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